Fine Line

I have been completely submerged into the BFL program for a while now. It is on my mind ALL THE TIME. Wanting to lose the extra pounds is a constant thought.

I guess I vocalize those thoughts too often. My little 5 year old girl has begun to comment on how she needs to exercise more and asked if she is fat. All my girls are very thin except her. She is a built a little bigger than the rest but is by no means fat. Her face is very round with cute squishy cheeks and it makes her appear larger than she is. It breaks my heart to have her question her self image. She has been asking if things have too much sugar in them and commenting that she should have an apple instead of this or that. We eat very healthy 90% of the time. I allow my children sugary snacks sometimes.

I think I need to keep my thoughts to myself and not talk about it. The reasons for doing this is #1: To be healthy, live long and feel good and #2: To be a healthy example to my girls. Yes I am trying to live healthier but vocalizing it so much is not healthy for my girls. REALITY CHECK.

Road Block

I haven't been missing my workouts and put a lot of effort into them.

My eating however is not 100% clean. I know this is why I am not dropping the pounds and seeing fabulous transformation changes. People sometimes wonder why they aren't losing..it is because we are not putting into our mouth the nourishment we need and putting into our mouth the nourishment we don't need.

I have hit a roadblock. I am leaving for vacation this weekend and for some mental reason I have allowed myself to veer off the path of complete clean eating. I know it will be difficult to eat the BFL on vacation. I know when I get back I will be able to stick to the plan. I don't get why I am weak in this area, but I am.

Week 7 Stats

1/2/11..................................2/19/11
Weight: 168.8...........................Weight: 158.8 (+0.4 for week, - 10.0 total)
BodyFat %: 37.42........................Body Fat %: 32.06
BMI: 29.0 overweight....................BMI: 27.1 overweight
Neck: 12 3/4............................Neck: 12 6/16
Bust: 38 1/4............................Bust: 37
Waist: 32 3/4...........................Waist: 31
Stomach: 41 1/2.........................Stomach: 38 3/4
Lower Hips: 43..........................Lower Hips: 41
Right Upper Thigh: 25 2/16..............R U Thigh: 24
Right Lower Thigh: 18 1/4...............R L Thigh: 18 1/4
Left Upper Thigh: 25 1/16...............L U Thigh: 24
Left Lower Thigh: 18 1/4................L L Thigh: 18 1/4
Right Bicep: 12 1/16....................R Bicep: 12
Left Bicep: 12 1/16.....................L Bicep: 12
Right Calve: 15 3/4.....................R Calve: 15 1/4
Left Calve: 15 3/4......................L Calve: 15 1/4

I gained a little this week. Damn it. I did lose 1/2 inch in my hips! Some off my calves a little off the neck. The hips loss makes me happy. I did harder cardio this week than I ever have but I know I didn't eat as clean as I should have. It sure shows on the scale when you eat more sugar or carbs than I should.

Zumba

Last night I tried Zumba! It was a great cardio workout and a lot fun! My booty doesn't quite move the way the instructors did but I definately have enough of it that it should!!

Best HIIT yet!

This morning I feel INVIGORATED! I did my 20 min HIIT and hit highs. I feel myself becoming stronger and healthier.

After my HIIT I did 7 sets of sprints. 7.0 for 1 min each with 45 sec rests in between. I returned home and my husband commented that I must have worked hard because the back of my shirt was all wet.

I feel fabulous. I love this feeling again.

Week 6 Stats

1/2/11..................................2/12/11
Weight: 168.8...........................Weight: 158.4 (-1.4 for week, - 10.4 total)
BodyFat %: 37.42........................Body Fat %: 32.06
BMI: 29.0 overweight....................BMI: 27.1 overweight
Neck: 12 3/4............................Neck: 12 1/2
Bust: 38 1/4............................Bust: 37
Waist: 32 3/4...........................Waist: 31
Stomach: 41 1/2.........................Stomach: 38 3/4
Lower Hips: 43..........................Lower Hips: 41 1/2
Right Upper Thigh: 25 2/16..............R U Thigh: 24
Right Lower Thigh: 18 1/4...............R L Thigh: 18 1/4
Left Upper Thigh: 25 1/16...............L U Thigh: 24 2/16
Left Lower Thigh: 18 1/4................L L Thigh: 18 1/4
Right Bicep: 12 1/16....................R Bicep: 12
Left Bicep: 12 1/16.....................L Bicep: 12
Right Calve: 15 3/4.....................R Calve: 15 1/2
Left Calve: 15 3/4......................L Calve: 15 1/2

At least I lost some this week. I really am noticing a difference in my abs, back and thighs. It doesn't show much in the photos, but I can feel it working on the inside. Hopefully within the next couple of weeks I will see a noticable difference. I am a little scared because the starting of week 8 when you are supposed to really start to change is when I will be on vacation. I will have to work extra hard at watching what I eat and exercise while I am there. I can't imagine I won't want to work out though! I crave it!

Stress

Yep it is official. I am a stress eater. Stress with my teenage daughter and trying to manage 5 children and a husband and a house and bills and...ya we all know the daily stuff. I ended up thinking about my problems a lot yesterday and ended up eating a small Kit Kat and a Diet Dr. Pepper. I feel guilty.

This morning I did 15 mins on the elliptical and then my HIIT 20 mins on the treadmill. I ran faster than normal and it felt really good to let go of some of that stress. It felt A LOT better than eating that chocolate and soda. Why do I turn to food? I was pretty upset with myself and when I got home after work, I had to unwind so I watched my recored show "The Office", which by the way is damn funny, and thought of diving into the Doritos in the closet. But I didn't. I wasn't hungry and I knew I was just trying to mask stress. I'm glad I didn't do it and recognized it. Too bad I had eaten the chocolate but that is part of life. Making mistakes and moving forward.

I will get to my goal. Someday.

Drenched in happiness

Today I did 20 mins on the elliptical and couldn't quite reach a "10". I felt the burn and my heart was racing but not that ten feeling.

SOOOO...I got on the treadmill and did HIIT for 20 mins. I hit 10's and felt so empowered! I ran faster than normal and with more ease. I was drenched when I was finished from both machines and I felt amazing. I felt happy. I feel happy.

I love Body For Life.

Feeling down

I have reached a point where I have teetered between 157 and 165 for so long now that I feel like I haven't made any progress and will forever be at the size I am. All the extra early morning workouts are very difficult and eating different than my large family is mentally hard. I want to throw in the towel and just say, "I am this weight, I might as well enjoy life instead of stressing." I hope I don't and will move forward but with all that us on my daily plate of taking care of 5 children and nurturing a marriage takes almost all my energy.

I'm tired. If I don't see changes soon, I'm afraid I will give up.

Week 5 Stats

1/2/11..................................2/5/11
Weight: 168.8...........................Weight: 159.8 (-2.0 for week, - 9.0 total)
BodyFat %: 37.42........................Body Fat %: 32.67
BMI: 29.0 overweight....................BMI: 27.3 overweight
Neck: 12 3/4............................Neck: 12 1/2
Bust: 38 1/4............................Bust: 37
Waist: 32 3/4...........................Waist: 31
Stomach: 41 1/2.........................Stomach: 38 3/4
Lower Hips: 43..........................Lower Hips: 41 3/4
Right Upper Thigh: 25 2/16..............R U Thigh: 24 1/4
Right Lower Thigh: 18 1/4...............R L Thigh: 18 1/4
Left Upper Thigh: 25 1/16...............L U Thigh: 24 6/16
Left Lower Thigh: 18 1/4................L L Thigh: 18 1/4
Right Bicep: 12 1/16....................R Bicep: 12
Left Bicep: 12 1/16.....................L Bicep: 12
Right Calve: 15 3/4.....................R Calve: 15 10/16
Left Calve: 15 3/4......................L Calve: 15 1/2

I almost lost all that I gained the week before. It has really made me realize that all the VERY hard work it takes to lose I certainly don't want to have setbacks and gains. It is too hard to work it back off. On a high note, I have lost 7.95 inches and 9 lbs! I do want to celebrate that I have made changes even if they are not exactly what I hoped they would be by now.

Week 5 going strong

So far this week my workouts have been pretty intense. I am feeling stronger and have bumped up my speed on my HIIT and the weight on my lifting.

I have been good on my diet and plan to continue doing my best. I am hoping I can drop the weight that I gained last week. I wish I hadn't let myself not give 100%. It sets you back and is simply not worth it!!